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But seriously

2005-05-13 @ 2:11 p.m.

Due to the overwhelming and very much surprising number of comments regarding my diary, I decided to just F-it and write about mundane, normal, everyday sort of chickie-leg events. First of all I need to stop referring to myself in the third person, it's annoying even to me.

That's one of my problems. I get annoyed WAY too easily. Those that know me are currently nodding their heads in agreement, if not flapping their arms like a bird in astonishment that I am actually admiting my faults....oh wait, there are more, don't worry. I'll save those for future non-humorous boring entries.

Anyway my sister recently revealed to me that when/if I ever get married she is going to sit the "lucky" man down and explain a few things to him. First on the list: to not let me ruin his life. Gotta love the truthitude of the family. Apparently the reason that I am not married, and have not had a successful relationship is due to my controlling, possessive and jealous nature. I will start to date someone, and once everything is comfortable, I began the metamorphosis into Evil Chickie Legs. I find the most ridiculous things to get annoyed about, and somehow convince myself that I can change whatever their supposed faults are. Eventually this leads to fighting, and a break-up. And the thing is I know I do this. When I start to date someone I warn them of this. I tell them flat out, you will one day regret the day you met me. To which they respond "I don't see how that is possible". Then I say "wait for it". I don't think I've been wrong yet. I'd like to blame my bi-polarishness for some of my issues, but that's really not a valid excuse all the time.

Being single for the past year and a half (I'm hoping) has been a positive experience for me. Sure, it sucks at times, especially when my friends get engaged, or start having kids or do something else that warrants throat punching...but I'm praying that when I do decide to be in a serious relationship again that I will be able to control my possessive tendancies and allow someone to have their faults, because I sure as hell have mine.

There is a reason I'm thinking about all of this now, but I don't want to go into detail right now. I'm not sure what I'm doing most of the time. I've been told I'm too nice, and then later too mean. I've always been an 'extreme' person. And I don't mean like cliff jumping while snorting cocaine wearing a tube top. I mean like I'm always either really really happy or really really sad. Or extremely impulsive or very subdued. It always amazes me that someone would actually want to be with someone like me after they witness all of this. I'm not really sure what my point is, and I'm very hesitant about not deleting this, but I promised several of my peeps that I would cease with the Phantom Pirates.

And that, my friends, is called 'A Regular Entry'. KICK IT.

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