Please, if you truly loved me, one of you guys would buy this for me:

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=3668430652&category=3893

"BUSINESSES ALL OVER NEED TO ADVERTISE. IT'S BEEN PROVEN THAT SOUND & MOTION ARE 2 OF THE MOST POWERFUL ADVERTISING TOOLS. NOW YOU TOO CAN GET YOUR BUSINESS NOTICED WITH YOUR VERY OWN TALKING PIRATE ROBOT MANNEQUIN. ENTERTAIN YOUR GUESTS TODAY, WHILE LEAVING LASTING IMPRESSIONS THAT KEEP THEM COMING BACK FOR MORE. "

Don't even ask how I found this...The seller even mentions that it comes with an ac adapter for YOUR CAR. Hells yeah, can you say HOV lane? I'd like to see a cop pull me over and tell me I can't drive in the HOV lane just b/c of this kick ass PirateRobot. Also notice his name is 'General Lee'... is he a pirate or an armyman? He's so mysterious! And the dude spelled it 'ay mate' instead of 'aye matie'...is he an Aussie now?? I didn't know we had Aussie Pirates (other than Russell Crowe) I mean it's not only a PIRATE. but it's also A ROBOT. I can't think of anything else that could kick it's ass. Unless it was a pirate-shark-robot. Then well yeah, mabye.