Step right up! Get your Creative Juices!
2004-05-03 @ 11:09 p.m.
There are many, many MANY things about graduating from college that makes me happy. And at the top of that list is realizing that I won't have to hear some of the very annoying, and sometimes, disturbing phrases I would hear from my teachers.
For instance whenever there was an art project, or a writing assignment, or some sort of original project, I would hear almost every single one of my teachers say, "now really get your creative juices flowing with this one".
Through my 23 years of schooling, I've probably heard this phrase more than anyone else I know. Why, you ask? Because most of the classes I have taken, in high school, and all three of my colleges have been 'creative-oriented'. From studio art, to graphic design, to video...I've heard that phrase about eleventy-billion times.
Even when I was in grade school it creeped me out. I mean seriously, WTF? Who says that? It's the most retarded saying EVER. I dare you to disagree. I mean whenever someone would say it, images of brain juice would come into my head, and teachers drooling over the idea of sucking our little brains dry of this precious, precious 'creative juice'. They would then sell it for top dollar to the mathematics department.
"OOh Dr. Trigonoma-loser, young Bethie is extra creative. I value her juice at $500 per liter."
"Liter? We don't use the metric system, you stupid bitch!"
"Forget that, we need to somehow harness the technology of these young kids and their creative juices. In fact, ...I've got it! We will simply tell them to 'get their creative juices flowing!"
"But, that's too obvious! Shouldn't we be a little subtle about it?"
"Heavens no, they will simply do what we say...mahahahahahah"
Please, please future teachers of America, whoever you are, please refrain from spreading this disease, this retarded step-child of encouragement to your students. Because seriously, come on. Seriously.